Existentialism is a philosophical approach that focuses on the subjective experience of individual existence and the meaning and purpose of life. From an existential perspective, performance anxiety can be viewed as a manifestation of anxiety and uncertainty, straining against an awareness of our personal mortality and ultimate separation from life. Performance anxiety is often characterized by an increased awareness of the possibility of failure, coupled with hyper-sensitivity to the meanings associated with the consequences of failing, including perceived judgment from others. This can threaten not only our sense of worth but also our sense of survival.

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Differentiating our existence from others is partly achieved by having an identity, which is made up of the meaning we derive from our preferences, activities, and accomplishments. In this sense, performance anxiety reflects our deep-seated need and desire for validation, recognition, and significance in a world that is inherently unpredictable and uncertain, in a state somewhere between hovering and poised for ultimate separation. Failure may be a part of life, but it holds a significant impact, similar to a big-ticket item like a car or a house, metaphorically speaking. The concept of “carpe diem” (seize the day) can be seen as cavalier in this context.

Existentialist thinkers emphasize the importance of embracing the fundamental uncertainty and ambiguity of life and finding meaning and purpose in the face of this uncertainty. Overcoming performance anxiety, from this perspective, requires a willingness to confront and accept the inevitability of failure and the possibility of rejection, and to cultivate a sense of purpose and meaning regardless of the outcome of a particular performance or activity.

This involves a fundamental shift in our relationship to failure, rejection, and how we process the outcomes of our performances. Instead of treating outcomes as determiners of our self-worth, it involves recognizing the accomplishment of the performance, distinguishing progress and areas for improvement, and focusing on the sense of meaning and purpose derived from the activity or experience, rather than the transitory assessment of how well we perform that activity. By avoiding or denying failure and rejection, we miss the opportunity to confront and recognize what needs to be improved, which perpetuates a cycle of continuing failures and negative perception of them.

To develop a sense of purpose and meaning that transcends how well we perform an activity, we need to identify and connect with our deepest values, passions, and aspirations that are represented in the activity. This involves knowing our values and realizing the meaning an activity holds for us, rather than solely focusing on how well we perform according to others.

Focusing on the process, the actual skill, not just in preparation for performance but also in embracing the vulnerability and surrendering to the experience of imperfection and uncertainty, is crucial. This shift in focus helps us move away from an external locus of control and validation and develop an internal sense of purpose and meaning that is individually derived from the activity.

Pragmatically speaking, by focusing on the process, we shift our attention away from the outcome and onto the experience of engaging in the activity itself. Being overly invested in the outcome of a performance leaves us vulnerable to continuing pressure, anxiety, fear of failure, and threat of rejection. This reinforces self-doubt, negative self-talk, and a lack of confidence in our abilities, which further impairs our ability to perform at our best. Instead, engaging in the activity and seeing the performance as a means to gauge what works in relation to a deeper satisfaction or fulfillment from participating in the activity itself can help develop a sense of mastery and genuine confidence in our abilities. Valuing ourselves strictly by our performance or worrying about how others perceive us doesn’t foster or increase our performance or the personal meaning we derive from the activity; in fact, it only hinders it.

Performance anxiety is the manifestation of an existential double bind, a mutual catch-22 underlying the fear of success with the fear of failure. When individuals are told that they have the potential to do anything, they may feel pressured to live up to those expectations, but may choose to avoid trying altogether, for fear of failing and confirming their worst fears. Even though a person has the skills, abilities, and resources to achieve their goals, they may be afraid of what will happen if they fail to do so; or worse, even if they succeed, they won’t live up to what success could bring, such as increased responsibility, attention, or pressure. This can be especially true in situations where success is highly visible, such as in public speaking, athletics, or the arts, where there is a risk of being judged or evaluated by others. They may worry that success will disrupt their current relationships or way of life and be reluctant to take the risks necessary to achieve their goals.

On one hand, the person fears failure will reveal their inadequacy, providing evidence confirming they lack worth; however, on the other hand, by avoiding even attempting challenges only sheds doubt on their competency, and possibly proving this, albeit due to a lack of evidence. Plainly, with so little counter friction, believing they are inadequate is self-reinforcing. Whichever hand it is, the fear of others judging the person harshly, perhaps rejecting them, or the unapparent agency and competency, will likely result in shame and continuing self-doubt.

Although the fear of failure is overwhelming, and the fear of success is difficult to overcome, both are common experiences and possible to work through. As with any challenge, it involves identifying and challenging negative thought patterns, developing coping strategies for managing anxiety and fear, and gradually taking steps towards achieving one’s goals and aspirations. It may be helpful to seek support from a therapist or counselor to navigate these complex emotions and work towards overcoming performance anxiety. With time, effort, and self-compassion, it is possible to break free from the grip of performance anxiety and pursue success in a healthy and fulfilling way.